Everything is Mental (Even the Physical)

How My Body Has Changed As I’ve Healed My Trauma

Get your mind right, the body will follow.

The body keeps the score — one of the best trauma books of all time and an incredibly apt saying.

These are some things I’ve noticed the last couple weeks as I round the bend on quitting my job and really get ready to take life by the balls.

  1. My body temperature has normalized. I’ve always run cold my entire life (97) and am now sitting around 98. I used to heat up a lot once I got into bed (no more) and now can take colder showers easily (which in turn has improved my skin).
  2. I’m sweating less. As my body’s ability to preserve homeostasis has improved, so has my sensitivity to external temperature changes. I’ve always heated up a lot whenever I exercise (and sweat a lot) and hated it. That’s more or less gone now.
  3. I’ve leaned out. I’ve slowly begun to shed water weight noticeably around my stomach and face. My guess is this is related to fight or flight from PTSD.
  4. My BO is gone. As I sweat less, any residual BO I used to have (from exercise or stress) is now gone. I’ve never been a big deodorant or cologne guy, so this has been a pleasant change.
  5. My voice has deepened. This is a new development (past week or so), but as my anxiety has gone away, I’m speaking much more strongly, from the bottom of my chest and back of my throat. My shoulders don’t rise when I talk to strangers anymore and I sound gooooood. On my Jack Harlow shit.
  6. My fingers are getting stronger. Perhaps the weirdest one of the bunch. I’ve always had a weak left hand and weak left shoulder. It plagued me in my saxophone playing as a kid (made it harder to trill notes) and forced me to overdevelop my left hand in basketball. I’ve been waking up with a super sore left ring finger and my hands overall feel lighter.
  7. My diet is changing — I’m finally noticing what have likely been lifelong intolerances to dairy, gluten, sugar, caffeine, etc. Bread and cheese are hitting me so much harder than ever before. Probably bc I’m relaxed enough to notice.

My sleep still hasn’t improved yet but I’m hopeful.

I’ll add to this as I learn more. Do the real work so everything else isn’t.

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Carter Owen

Carter Owen

Aspiring author and humble observer of human behavior writing from NYC — sharing my journey and what I’m learning along the way. Think more, feel better.